Tag: anxiety
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Hard conversations
Tomorrow I am going to have that super serious conversation with the ex. I have already drafted my list of concerns and points I need to make. I actually feel really good about this conversation. Although I plan to use some of the same language from the healthy relationships program my dad and I did…
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I Refuse
I’ve hinted at possible changes coming up soon. Well, these changes are no longer possible, but will happen definitely. The ex got a job nearby and will be here within a month. Because of the kind way my wife and I have handled things, the ex assumes we are all friends. Just a minute there,…
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Priorities
There are possible developments on the the horizon that may challenge me. I guess that’s true of anyone, at any given time though. I have struggled in the past with prioritizing things properly. Like always putting myself last or putting work before my family at the wrong times. It feels like I’m looking at another…
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Room of Pain
No, no, not that kind of room of pain. This isn’t about BDSM. No judgement if that’s your jam, though. I’m talking about this place inside of me that seems to hold weird memories and the extreme pain of rejection. I was an outcast for so long. It seemed to follow me wherever I went…
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The End of an Era
In the US Air Force, as in all military branches, there is a hierarchy of organizations. To make it easy, I’ll just talk the basics on a base. You have the wing, which is composed of groups. And each group is composed of squadrons, some sorted by job or career field like civil engineering, and…
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Conversations with Boy #3
I finally told Boy #3 all about me. My mind is blown. First I told him that I was going to change my name soon. Then we talked about how the doctor asked him at his last appointment if he identifies as a boy. I asked him if he knew why she asked him that…
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A little experiment
For years I wanted to write a blog but I was scared of my own voice. Sometimes I would post something remotely controversial on my FB page, like the time I said for everyone to understand that representation matters when our VP was sworn in. Immediately old military co-workers jumped on it, saying things like…
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focus, Focus, FOCUS!!
My ADHD brain has lost its way. In the last few days I have left a huge trail of destruction through the house, been unable to finish tasks, and have been daydreaming more than ever. Today was no different. I made a mistake that was so cringeworthy that I am hesitant to repeat it here…