Tag: Mental Health
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sitting in my shame
Yesterday I had to do a VA exam for part of the claim that was initially deferred. But because I’ve already got 100%, these exams don’t even matter. I can’t get any more money at this point unless I lose a limb. But I still feel like I should finish all of these open exams…
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definitions
How does a dream start? Where does a dream come from? How do you figure out what your dream is (or dreams are)? How do you know what you are meant to do in life? We are defined by our jobs and our families and sometimes what we believe in, but what really are those…
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Stepping Back
When I first started thinking about retiring from the Air Force, I had so many ideas about what I wanted to do. A huge part of me was considering applying for this recall that would give me two more years in the Air Force. I felt like I needed that security blanket, like I wasn’t…
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Wow
I found out today that a fellow blogger who wrote some really great stuff on mental health and was very open about suicide died earlier this month. She was open about what works and doesn’t for her, and all the aspects of her own mental health struggles. Her stuff was hard hitting and made you…
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My Life is Forever CHANGED
I had the toughest conversation I never thought I would be able to have with my father this morning. We had planned to do the last lesson in our emotionally healthy relationships program today. He called me on FaceTime and I answered. We talked about what’s new and what is going on here and there.…
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I am tired
This weird thing with my dad is exhausting me emotionally. Everything was going really well with us until he asked if I could just work on things with my mom because she was almost jealous that he and I were talking so much and doing so much better. Why would he do that? Why would…
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Another Day, Another Therapy Appointment
Yesterday I had a therapist appointment. I go twice a month right now, but I may increase that over the winter if I need to. I kept it a little more surface level for most of the appointment, although we did talk about some of the deep stuff at the beginning. The biggest take away…
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To Fight…or not
Seasonal affective disorder has me living the life of GoT Stark House: Last night felt bad for some reason. It was like my emotions were all mixed up in a sad way. I have noticed as I heal that I am not very knowledgeable about my emotions. I always thought I was good at emotions…
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Addressing the past
So my dad and I continued on our quest to improve our relationship and bring it to a healthier place this week. The unit was on “clean fighting.” Sadly I could check off just about everything on the dirty fighting list; denial, avoidance, walking away, sarcasm, yelling, ignoring, and more. We didn’t do the activity…
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My doctor’s visit today
I go to an awesome doctor’s office. Last year I saw the nurse practitioner for my first appointment but a few months ago I got a call that she was leaving and would I like to see the doctor instead. I said sure, because I had heard awesome things about him. The staff there is…