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Zander's Inside Voice

…zany, too deep introspection from a scattered perfectionist

About Me
  • It’s been way too long

    I realized a few days ago that I was approaching two weeks of not blogging at all. It wasn’t an intentional break, more of a need to retreat inside myself and keep my boundaries up with the squatter. Thankfully the squatter departed on Sunday for training and is out of the area for the next…

    zanderham13

    21st June 2023
    Hot Trigger, kids, Life, Mental Health, my soccer team stories, Raw, relationships, The Real Me
    anxiety, family, Mental Health, suicide, translife
  • Daily Prompt 6/9/23

    What a weird question! But it intrigued me. I’m not even sure what the oldest thing is that I own and still use daily. I have some seriously old shoes but I wear them rarely. I have slowly added a bunch of clothes since I retired from the military almost two and half years ago,…

    zanderham13

    9th June 2023
    daily prompt, Life, The Real Me
    dailyprompt, dailyprompt-1970
  • Daily Prompt 6/8/23

    I didn’t answer this question right away because I thought I’d answered it awhile back. I didn’t and I was thinking of a different prompt. So my tagline would be: Calm in chaos, scrambled in calmness. It’s crazy how when the shit hits the fan, I am calm inside and ready to handle the pressure.…

    zanderham13

    8th June 2023
    Life, Mental Health, Raw, The Real Me
    dailyprompt, dailyprompt-1964
  • Daily Prompt 6/6/23

    I am passionate about my family, friends, animals, helping people, and education at all levels. I think most people are passionate about their family, friends, and people close to them. Same with animals, particularly pets. And I am guessing helping people is another common passion. I also don’t think education is too original either, but…

    zanderham13

    6th June 2023
    daily prompt, Life
    dailyprompt, dailyprompt-1967
  • College Reunion

    My college reunion was this past weekend. I didn’t go. I did attend my wife’s last year. But there’s so much I can’t seem to get over with my class. There’s people I can’t stand and people that I’m sure can’t stand me. I was so different back then, so unhealed. I was with the…

    zanderham13

    6th June 2023
    Life, Memories, Mental Health, Raw, relationships, The Real Me
    adhd, anxiety, family, Mental Health, ptsd, translife, trauma
  • Stop holding it all in

    (Mental note to self-it does not help you to hold in your emotions. You know this. You have learned this lesson repeatedly over the last three or so years. Just stop already!) I woke up yesterday and right away I knew I wasn’t feeling like myself. Something was off. I was cranky but for no…

    zanderham13

    1st June 2023
    Air Force, Gratitude, Hot Trigger, Life, Memories, Mental Health, Raw, The Real Me
    deployment, military, ptsd, trauma
  • Daily Prompt 5/31/23

    This is a great question because I AM going to change my name. I am changing it to Zander after a very lengthy audition process over the past year and a half. I tried out some other names in my head but nothing really stuck. As a kid I always loved Sebastian, Simon, and Timothy…

    zanderham13

    31st May 2023
    daily prompt, The Real Me
    dailyprompt, dailyprompt-1961
  • Myers-Briggs, 16 personalities, whatever

    So I’ve taken this test like 100 times and every single time I get a different personality type that doesn’t actually fit very well. A friend shared results on social media and I took the test a few days ago and got yet another unfitting result. Then my wife said she took it and so…

    zanderham13

    31st May 2023
    Hot Trigger, Life
    adhd, Mental Health, myers-briggs, translife
  • May 30, 2007

    Sangin, Helmand province, near the Kajaki Dam…one Chinook helicopter is shot down, supposedly by multiple rocket-propelled grenades (RPGs). I was there, 30K+ feet above it all. We moved to assist the recovery operations. The helicopter had been on fire when it crashed so there were definitely no survivors. Then there was an ambush on the…

    zanderham13

    30th May 2023
    Air Force, Hot Trigger, kids, Life, Memories, Mental Health, Raw, The Real Me
    depression, family, Mental Health, military, ptsd, suicide, trauma, war
  • Unpopular Opinion

    I saw Dear Evan Hansen last Saturday. I knew it won a bunch of Tony Awards. I knew it was well loved and very popular. And I did not like it. I loved parts of it, I must admit. There were some great songs. The acting was really good but the characters weren’t as developed…

    zanderham13

    26th May 2023
    Entertainment, Hot Trigger, kids, Life, Mental Health, music, people watching, Raw, relationships, Uncategorized, writing
    anxiety, depression, family, Mental Health, suicide, theatre
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