Tag: depression
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Christmas Decorating
When I was a kid, my mom decorated our whole house. She had specific things for each window, garlands for the railings, outdoor lights, indoor lights, old decorations, bubble lights you couldn’t buy anymore, ornaments I made in kindergarten and at Sunday school every year when I was really young. She made the house feel…
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Too Much
It’s all too much today. I feel so overwhelmed with everything. There were 5 conditions that the VA deferred and they don’t really matter anymore because I already hit 100% with the conditions they rated earlier. Now one of the companies they use for appointments is calling me and I cannot answer my phone right…
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Wisdom
I actually learned this a couple years ago and when I can stick to it, I feel so much happier. Forcing things has always led me to chase things that aren’t meant for me. When I’ve gotten those things, it doesn’t do anything for me. Or I realized that the path I was on was…
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The Sound of Silence
Disturbed version (Official Video) This version of this song is MY SONG. David Draimen, the lead singer, just emotes so much during the entire song. The music, the instruments, the way he sings the lyrics, his face, all of it is so intense. I’ve known the original version of this song for my entire life…
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The Off Button
I am crazy empathetic and mostly I love it. Sometimes I hate it. Today I hate it. I am very close to my ex’s family. The parents, siblings, siblings’ spouses, and the nieces/nephew are mostly cool people. We all made a choice to stay family. Sure, the kids are their blood family, but the kids…
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Somebody else’s life…
I love Boy George and Culture Club. I have loved them since I was about 6 years old. The whole idea of a boy dressed like a girl didn’t even strike me as strange. I liked their songs, their voices, all of their music. As I’ve gotten older, that hasn’t changed, although I understand so…
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My Life is Forever CHANGED
I had the toughest conversation I never thought I would be able to have with my father this morning. We had planned to do the last lesson in our emotionally healthy relationships program today. He called me on FaceTime and I answered. We talked about what’s new and what is going on here and there.…
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To Fight…or not
Seasonal affective disorder has me living the life of GoT Stark House: Last night felt bad for some reason. It was like my emotions were all mixed up in a sad way. I have noticed as I heal that I am not very knowledgeable about my emotions. I always thought I was good at emotions…
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Closure Not Needed?
This one hit me over the head yesterday. I always considered closure important and something that I needed to get over things. I was always upset when someone just stopped talking to me completely and I didn’t get all the answers I needed. I felt like I couldn’t just let things go and I was…