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I Hate the VA
On December 22 last year I submitted my 24 item disability claim to the Veterans Administration. I had one year after retirement to get it in and still get back pay all the way to the day after my retirement was effective. It took me almost that whole year because I needed to relive all…
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Letter grades are bullshit
They don’t tell you how much effort went into that subject. They don’t tell you that someone who really struggles with it gave it everything they had until they were mentally exhausted and couldn’t get it quite right. They don’t tell you that someone actually gained more ability than anyone else. That’s right, they put…
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The Bags I Carry
We are all carrying way too many bags of crap around in our hearts and souls. This is an analogy that I always liked because I felt so heavy for so long because I was carrying the weight of the world in my bags. I have always been an intense thinker and sometimes anxiety-ridden worrier…
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The Off Button
I am crazy empathetic and mostly I love it. Sometimes I hate it. Today I hate it. I am very close to my ex’s family. The parents, siblings, siblings’ spouses, and the nieces/nephew are mostly cool people. We all made a choice to stay family. Sure, the kids are their blood family, but the kids…
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Somebody else’s life…
I love Boy George and Culture Club. I have loved them since I was about 6 years old. The whole idea of a boy dressed like a girl didn’t even strike me as strange. I liked their songs, their voices, all of their music. As I’ve gotten older, that hasn’t changed, although I understand so…
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Wow
I found out today that a fellow blogger who wrote some really great stuff on mental health and was very open about suicide died earlier this month. She was open about what works and doesn’t for her, and all the aspects of her own mental health struggles. Her stuff was hard hitting and made you…
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How to be Human
These are just a few of the things spinning around in my head these last two years after military retirement and figuring out who I really am after 20 years of being mostly the same as I was and the same as everyone around me. Learning not to fear failure and not being who I…
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Crowds
For years I have struggled with crowds. But sometimes I can handle it. There’s never really been any way I can accurately predict when I will suddenly be unable to handle a crowd. I have been in huge crowds at Disney World and been fine. I’ve been in a smallish crowd in a living room…
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Fitting for Today
I try to live by this advice with my kids. It makes all the difference in the world when they feel like they can tell you something you’re doing that’s hurtful. It was something I never had…until today. I am so grateful for the emotional growth my father has made this year. It had changed…
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My Life is Forever CHANGED
I had the toughest conversation I never thought I would be able to have with my father this morning. We had planned to do the last lesson in our emotionally healthy relationships program today. He called me on FaceTime and I answered. We talked about what’s new and what is going on here and there.…