Category: The Real Me
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Suicide
(Please be aware that I talk very openly and candidly about my own experiences with suicide. If this is not something easy for you, please don’t continue reading or read with caution. This is not meant to hurt or trigger anyone else.) I understand that suicide is something that is very difficult to talk about…
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Validation of the Sadness
Tiny Buddha always seems to know exactly what I am going through and what I need to hear to feel better. Grieving has been hard this past year and a half since I realized and processed the biggest part of my truth. That day I finally slowed down and listened to what was screaming inside…
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Those Hard Things
Thinking about the deep things I avoid is kind of tough for me today. I feel myself wanting to avoid all of those things, even letting them in feels like too much right now. I know that I don’t need to pressure myself to finish that list today, but I want to get it done…
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Family…or not?
fam-i-ly noun a group of one or more parents and their children living together as a unit. “the family lived in a large house with a lot of land.” all the descendants of a common ancestor. “The house has been owned by the same family for 300 years.” adjective designed to be suitable for children…
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The Nothingness of Today
I gave myself a day with no expectations, nothing specific to do other than one scheduled appointment, help the kids cook dinner, and get out trash and recycling. I suppose that sounds like a lot, but it was spread out over the entire day. I also did some weeding around the flowers out front and…
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Self Care Monday
Today is the first weekday in 3 weeks that we don’t have our contractor and his team working on our bathroom. The lack of construction noise is so pleasant. I love our contractor and his team; they are GREAT people who I trust to do work when I had to leave for appointments and grocery…
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The Realized Dream
Years ago, I heard all about this crazy awesome broadway show about history. There was some weird controversy about immigrants and the VP at the time. That was really when Hamilton came on my radar. Living in the Southeast with someone who despises musicals, it never occurred to me that I would even like it.…
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Dear Dad,
One of the ways I have been coping with everything is writing letters. I write them in my head all the time to you, to Mom, to the kids, to everyone. Sometimes I write them down. I’ve often thought about writing an entire book in the form of letters. I’m still thinking about it, actually.…
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Traumatic Independence
I first heard about independence as a result of trauma earlier this year. It blew my mind because as long as I can remember, my parents told me I was born independent. I think part of that is my personality and the other part is based on trauma. I’ve read a lot on attachment to…
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Dear Friend,
You were my very first friend in the Tourette’s community. After J was diagnosed, I had nowhere to turn. I didn’t know how to handle the official diagnosis and finding the camp just before the deadline to sign up was exactly what we needed. Camp was exactly what he and I both needed. He found…