I’ve been thinking these last few days about everything I have been through and how it was hard at the time in most cases, but how some of these things didn’t feel as hard until after the fact. Like in the moment I was just surviving and pushing through, not realizing that one day things could be better. I didn’t know what better would ever feel like.
Take a small child, with an innocent heart, and ignore him, abuse him, land then et him spend almost every work day in someone else’s house full of domestic violence. Let him watch physical abuse at the babysitter’s house while also being bullied at school and on the bus. Treat him like a second class citizen in his own home.
Then ignore his pleas for help when things get worse. Tell him that he’s weak, too sensitive. Talk over him and make him feel small. Send him out into the world with no belief in himself. Make him feel like he’s always the problem so that you can use that to shame him when he tries to defend himself from your attacks. Confuse him by coddling him when he’s trying to strike out on his own but then abandon him when he needs help.
He joins the military after college, the perfect place for shame to feast on his innards. And after 20 years of that bullshit, he finally is free. Free to be himself, free to have confidence, free of all of the things which had tied him down. But the craziest part is that he survived at all. He should not have made it. He should’ve died at age 14, 16, 18, 22, 23, 26, 27, 31, 36-45. But he didn’t die. Something inside of him made him want to stay alive even when everything around him was telling him that he shouldn’t even bother. That he didn’t matter.
So what now, when his government tells him that he isn’t even a valid person? WHAT IS FUCKING NEW?! He was always told to be seen and not heard, to be quiet, that no one cares what he thinks or has to say. When the people closest to him told him day after day as a child that he wasn’t valid the way he was. That he was different and he should be mocked.
Bane: “Oh, you think darkness is your ally. But you merely adopted the dark. I was born in it, molded by it. I didn’t see the light until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but blinding. The shadows betray you because they belong to me.”
So what is new about the government telling me I’m not valid? I can live like this. I grew up like this. I grew up in stress and pain. I grew feeling second class. I grew up feeling nothing but ashamed of everything about myself. And now the government wants me to feel bad, to feel shame, to hide myself, and to stop living my life. FUCK THAT.
And to everyone else who is hurting-the poor, the disabled, the uninsured, the elderly on social security, kids with special needs, anyone under the LGBTQIA+ umbrella, women, immigrants, people who feel abandoned by their party, EVERYONE HURTING – all we can do is live, help each other, and do our best to love and support each other. We don’t have to fight anymore. We don’t have to fight even when we disagree on anything. We can love people who are different in every way. We don’t have to fight amongst ourselves anymore. That’s what they all want from us. To keep us fighting because we outnumber them. If we don’t agree and we fight, we can’t join forces against them because we will win. There are more of us than them and they know it. They have most of the money and we have most of the people. Why do they get all the money that we have to earn for them? Why do we agree to this system?
We need to come together. We need to stop fighting. We need to set the rules for the ones we elect to represent us, not the other way around. They should do what we tell them to do, not what they want to do. They work for us, not the other way around.
No rich business person should be able to influence our government the way we are seeing now. Corporations aren’t people so why are they represented and we aren’t? This isn’t how it was meant to be; this is crap. We need to take control of OUR government now, before it’s too late. I don’t care if you think I’m a horrible person, but if you are done with the rich guy politics and corporations buying our government, stop what you are doing and love your neighbor, no matter what they look like, who they love, or what they do. Let’s get back to a community mindset and stop the fighting among ourselves.
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