I’m so sorry that I’ve been MIA for the past couple of weeks. I had a lot to do to prep for top surgery last Tuesday and I was on pain meds up until yesterday afternoon. I had my one week post-op appointment today and everything went well. Almost everything but I will get into that in a bit.
First off, I feel like a new person. My wife says I have more swagger and confidence that she’s ever seen. I can feel it. I felt happy and more like me from the minute I woke up, even before I got to see anything. Just the feel of it from the outside of the compression vest was crazy awesome.
The pain wasn’t terrible. Some of the after effects hurt more than I did the whole time I was in recovery mode. The pain killers definitely did their job and the compression vest combined with Motrin also kept the swelling and pain down. And then Saturday happened. I woke up extremely wet, having leaked through some type of gauze I couldn’t see. From that point forward, I was constantly wet and forced to use pads to absorb as much liquid as they could. It wasn’t from the surgery or the drains I’ve been stuck with. It was from a terrible allergic reaction to the prep materials they used. Chloraprep.
I’ve reacted to that before. Based on the itching I could feel and what happened on my right shoulder, I was 99.9% sure that they had used Chloraprep. Today it was pretty red and ragey. Some of it was oozing and the nurse who had removed the drains and all the dressings looked shocked. She brought the doctor in and he did not make any attempt to hide his shock. But I was just smiling and smiling because I was so impressed with the actual surgical work he did. And this rash was nothing compared to the mess I had on my arm back in 2019. I did see it later on after my first shower in a week and I guess it was pretty shocking. When I first saw it on my arm, it looked like a chemical burn that had popped all over the place and I still had inch long blisters just waiting to pop. Why I didn’t remember all the liquid that I had all over my arm for at least a week, I don’t know. Until I saw that it looked the same, I had no idea that all this liquid wasn’t actually related to the surgery. I thought something horrible was happening as a result of the actual surgery.
In 2019, at my last post-op for my arm, the hand surgeon told me that I had the worst rash he’d ever seen. I was so surprised when he said that because he act so cool when he first walked in and saw it. All he said that first time was “Looks like we’ve got a situation there on your arm.” He told me at that last appointment that I was white as a sheet and he didn’t want to freak me out any more than I already was by coming in and exclaiming “Holy hell, that’s the worst rash I’ve ever seen in all my years as a doctor.” Yup, that would’ve been really bad for me! But this time I wasn’t affected by anyone’s reaction. I could tell by my wife’s face that it was probably pretty bad.
Tomorrow I start a steroid pack to help with this reaction and today I started with diaper cream as a barrier layer wherever this rash exists. I had also used goats milk soap on the shoulder part of my rash, which calmed it quickly, so I made sure to use that all over the rash as well. Showering felt amazing, as it was not permitted until after the appointment today. I have felt dirty for days because sponge bathing just isn’t the same as actual showering. I have to be very gentle with the surgical area and can’t put my chest in the direct water stream for at least a month. That’s a lot to remember, same as it was hard to remember not to push up from sitting with my arms this past week.
This has been the single most validating step I’ve taken so far. I can’t believe how awesome I feel and how I even feel taller. It’s like when I look down, I can see the body I was supposed to have. I see in real life what I see in my head. And that makes me feel so much better. Now I definitely plan to get going on a new fitness journey once I’m cleared for regular activities in 8 weeks. I need to avoid friction against my chest for a long time, so that will impact what I wear to work out. But I do have some time to think about that. I bought some compression shirts that I plan to wear for this next part of the recovery period. I like what those shirts look like on me, even with the weight I want to lose and the swelling that will take time to resolve itself. Next up for my wardrobe change will be suspenders. I loved wearing suspenders as a kid and stopped completely after puberty. I think I will probably dress way more dapper than I ever thought I’d be able to. I can picture that version of me easily. It makes me happy.
Now that this big surgery is out of the way, I plan to be much more regular again with posting. I don’t have much coming up in the next few months, other than planning for my fitness and health journey and getting ready to coach for the lacrosse season in the spring. So many awesome things to look forward to!
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