People I admire and look to for advice…this is a moving target for me because my life is such a strange collection of completely different things, the list grows and shrinks as time goes on.
But no matter what, my number one is my wife. I admire her for a million and one different reasons but when it comes to advice, I know she will be honest, fair, and lightly sugarcoat things I don’t want to hear. I know that I’ve been defensive in the past and didn’t want to hear things from other people. But there is something about the way she tells me things that helps me to hear it humbly. And then I will action on what she tells me. I know that she will always tell my what’s best FOR ME, even if it might directly conflict with what she would prefer. That’s a lot of trust I don’t have with anyone else. I know that she will always have my back no matter what, even at the risk of hurting herself. Also a lot of trust.
Second is probably my dad. Things with him are so much better than they’ve been since I was in college. I trust that he will give me the benefit of his vast experience and he wants the best for me. I do admire him as well, but I also have to acknowledge that there are things about me that he doesn’t know that might impact how he’d give advice, so I don’t ask him about everything. My mom can also give great advice about some things, but being as socially anxious as she is, she has limited experience outside of the jobs she’s had and the brief experiences with friends as an adult. But she likes to learn new things and she’s curious, so she’s also got interesting takes on interactions between people.
The oddest place I go for advice sometimes is Boy #1 and Boy #2. I like their Zoomer take on things. They see everything through such a different perspective. They are young and idealistic, but more realistic than I ever was at their age. I’m not sure if I raised them to be more mature than I was at that age, but they definitely are. They have to deal with so much more than I ever did. But they are doing ok and I am proud of how they are turning out. I admire them too.
Zander's Inside Voice 
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