What advice would you give to your teenage self?
- Yes, this is really who you are. Embrace it. Don’t fight it. And don’t let everyone else tell you that it’s not okay to be who you really are. Stop compromising yourself RIGHT NOW and stay strong. You hurt right now, but you will survive.
- Stop pushing the pain down. This is going to destroy you in 1992, 1999, 2000-2001, 2007, 2012, 2015-2020. Acknowledge it and deal with it. The load you will start tackling in 2021 will be overwhelming, so start now.
- Yes, those traumas happened to you, all before you turned 10. It’s ok. You will be ok. Your pain is valid and no matter who is dismissing your trauma, it really happened and none of it is your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong that made adults hurt you.
- Do not, under any circumstance, say yes to a “simulated relationship” with your friend. This was the way to minimize you and keep you a secret. To hide you away from everyone else. This was a huge asshole move from someone who was not even your friend who could not accept their feelings for you. You used to love with your whole heart until this point. This entire summer broke you.
- Stick to what you know is in your heart. Stop looking for outside validation. Stop trying to convince yourself that you feel a way you don’t. Stop trying to fit in and be “normal.” You are fun and wacky and living with undiagnosed ADHD. You will survive. You will find answers eventually. You will get over all the pain and love with your whole heart again. Eventually.
- You are awesome, but you either won’t realize it or don’t believe it. You will find your people.
- And for the love of all things holy, DO NOT EVER TRY TO BLEACH YOUR HAIR. It doesn’t look good. No, it really doesn’t.
Zander's Inside Voice 
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