Zander's Inside Voice

So NaNoWriMo started yesterday. I have already written over 7000 of the 50,000 word goal, which puts me in great shape and well above the average number of words per day. I am happy with how it’s turning out so far! The story I wrote last time was too close to me and too personal, so I didn’t share it with anyone but my wife. So much of it was inspired by or directly taken from my life. This story is not any of that. It’s pure fiction about an emotionally abused woman who receives an anonymous text that her husband is cheating on her.

So far it’s taking on a life of its own and the characters are telling me who they are. Both times now it has surprised me how they just kind of introduce themselves and show you who they are and who they want to be. My main character is named Erin, and I pictured her as this spunky, short, red-haired woman. She’s actually really beaten down and emotionally abused by not only her husband, but also by her mother. She given up her entire identity to be a mom and a wife. Her mother is a terrible person. I hate that character so much already and so she is described in the most awful way because I just can’t find anything good about her.

Her father is going to be dead in the current time period but he’s a good guy in her flashbacks and he tried so hard to protect her from her mother, but he was beaten down too. Her brother is going to be absent. Her kids are very talented and awesome, but kind of a lot for her to be dealing with as her life falls apart around her.

I have wanted to write novels since I was a kid. Finishing that one last year was such a huge milestone for me. I had never finished anything I started writing. There’s just something about NaNoWriMo that motivates me to get to the end of it and be a winner! If only I could harness all of that year round and just keeping writing and writing! It feels so natural to me to write. And I write so many words so quickly. It’s like my brain is dictating the story to me and I can’t type the words as fast as I can think them.

I feel really good about finishing this project. Last year I was almost panicky that I wouldn’t be able to do it. This year I know I can but I can’t stop thinking that maybe last year was a fluke and it was a one time thing that I can’t repeat again. But I am feeling more confident that I can do this again. And I can do it any time I want to.

Maybe I have finally reached the place where I can actually start writing full time. That would be my wish. I love writing so much.